Off With Her Head!

I've always been fascinated with the kings and queens of England (I know, I know, a historian jonesing for royalty, go figure!) but when it comes to Anne Boleyn, there's a soft spot in my heart. When I saw that today is the anniversary of her death, a light bulb went off over my head. Blog post idea!

Anne is best remembered for being the 11-fingered witch who slept with her own brother (and a host of other guys) and gave poor embarassed King Henry VIII no choice but to execute her to rid himself and the royal family of her tainted presence.

Stand back folks cause I'm calling BS on that! Anne wasn't a witch and never cuckolded her husband (the extra finger thing might be true though). What Anne Boleyn was was a 16th century woman who bucked the system, showed her strength and got what she wanted out of life.

If you've never seen the Showtime series, The Tudors, you need to give it a view. Anne, played by Natalie Dormer, whose pic is above, was educated, intelligent and outspoken in a time when women were supposed to be nothing but walking wombs. Henry VIII was known for indulging in kingly pleasures (read "wham, bam, thank you ma'am") despite the fact that he had been married to Catherine of Aragon for many years. When Henry's eye fell on Anne, a lot of people were kind of shocked. Anne wasn't pretty by the day's standards; she had black hair, sallow skin and was tall and skinny. Plus Henry had already bopped her sister a few years earlier, possibly fathering a couple of kinglets on the wrong side of the blanket. But despite the grossness of this, Henry would take his pleasure from Anne and move onto the next lady on the smorgasbord. At least that's what Henry thought.

Anne had bigger ideas. She wasn't going to be like her sister and Henry's other cast-offs. If Henry wanted anything physical from her, he'd have to put a ring on her finger and the queen's crown on her head. Anne held out for somewhere around 7 years. She must have had some sort of magical mojo because what man will let a woman drag him around by the nose like that for 7 YEARS!!!! In the end, Henry had to break England away from the Catholic Church, completely change the laws in the land and annul his marriage to Catherine, but Anne became queen. Good for her right? (The title of this post tells you that's not true).

After a few years of marriage, a healthy daughter and a stillborn son, Henry decided that he was ready to be rid of Anne. But he couldn't just kick her to the curb. She was too smart and it would cause too much of an uproar in a country still reeling from all the changes he made before.

So his advisors come up with a bunch of charges against Anne. She spent some time alone talking to her brother so therefore she must have slept with him. She enjoyed having musicians and scholars around her so she must have slept with them. She had an extra finger on one hand so she's a witch who used her powers to enthrall the pitiful king. All of this was trumped up but it was enough for Henry to sign off on her death warrant. Her head was chopped off by a French swordsman because Henry did have a little pity and wanted the whole experience to be as quick and painless as possible for her. But Anne was dead and her love story/hate story with Henry has gone down in history. In the end though, Anne had the last laugh. Her healthy daughter with Henry went on to become Queen Elizabeth I, arguably one of the greatest of all English monarchs.

Why does Anne have a soft spot in my heart? Because my family is connected to hers. Anne's aunt, and namesake, Lady Anne Boleyn married Lord George Shelton leading to the begats and begats that worked all the way down to yours truly. Kind of cool, huh?

Do you have friggatriskaidekaphobia?

If you spent today hiding in your house, worried that the Boogeyman is going to get you, you might.

What is friggatriskaidekaphobia? It's the fear of Friday the 13th. And everytime one rolls around on the calendar, lots of folks clam up until they can flip to Saturday the 14th.

Where did fear come from? Now that's up for debate. The number 13 has always been seen as unlucky. There were 12 Olympian gods in Greek Mythology. Hestia, goddess of the hearth, stepped down and gave Dionysus, god of wine, her seat so there wouldn't be an unlucky number of gods. Jesus had 12 disciples. Twelve tribes of Israel, twelve hours in the day, twelve hours in the night, twelve months in the year (I could go on) so taking it that one step further to 13 has always been considered unlucky.

Where does the Friday part come in? In the big word for the phobia, "Frigga" is the queen of the gods in Norse mythology and Friday is named after her. She was definitely imposing but not necessarily phobia inducing.

Although there are a lot of reasons posed for the Friday the 13th fear, I think that the real reason came about because of an incident in 1307. The Knights Templar, a Christian religious order that protected pilgrims to the Holy Land during the Crusades, had gotten a little too powerful during their nearly 2 century history. By the date in question, the Templars had established a vast fortune and their own banking industry that loaned money to most of the crowned heads of Europe. What if you borrowed money from a religious group and couldn't pay it back? (Isn't that like defaulting on a loan from God?)

King Philip IV of France owed them so much money that he needed to come up with a crafty little plan to rid himself of his debt and if this plan broke the power of the Templars, then so be it. Philip sent out sealed missives to loyal men all across his lands with orders not to open or act on them until Friday, October 13, 1307. When the appointed day arrived and the loyal retainers opened their envelopes, they found orders to round up all the Templar Knights and charge them with heinous crimes such as homosexuality, urinating on church altars and spitting on the cross. Knights were rounded up, tortured and found guilty of heresy, a crime punishable by death. The Templar grand master's last words were curses on King Philip and the Pope, saying both would die by the end of the year... and they did! From that point on, Friday the 13th has been seen as a very unlucky day, a day in which you should watch your back and honor all superstitions, regardless of how ridiculous they seem.

Guess it's time for me to get off of here now and make sure that no black cats cross my path and to make sure I don't break any mirrors!

My answers to the essay question

I know that it took me a while but between grading all your finals and going to 2 graduations in the last week, I've been a slacker. What can I say?

But I promised some of you that I would publish my own answers to the assessment essay this semester. First and foremost, let me stress to you that these are my own views on the subject and in no way mean that if you didn't answer the way I did, I docked your grades. This is my personal opinion and you gave me yours. You know what they say about opinions...

One of the best essays I read started off with a comment along the lines of how we freak out about the idea of immigrants coming to this country. Every other country in the world should be so luck to have such a problem; our country is such a place of hope and chance for a better life that people fight to get here. An interesting take to say the least. But the issue is illegal immigration and that's what makes this such a touchy issue. There's a legal part and there's the human part and both sides are going to have to be addressed before the issue is settled. I really do pity the President and our government in this issue because no matter how they handle this decision, a lot of people are going to be very, very, very unhappy.

That gets us to the gist of the assessment question. With the unexplained breach in the space/time continuum, the President has the opportunity to pick from the short list of historical figures on the list I gave you. Who would I recommend and who would I tell him to avoid like the plague?

1. Eleanor Roosevelt- I didn't even have to read the question the whole way through before I was thinking about Eleanor. Honestly, the space/time continuum needs to be broken more often so every President has the opportunity to seek her advice. During her husband's administration and those of many other Presidents who followed him, she showed herself as a voice of reason and a voice for what was right. She believed in the rights of women and in Civil Rights, both at a time when such things were not necessarily kosher. Eleanor Roosevelt bent over backwards to make sure she knew what the common people needed from the government. She would not hesitate to make her voice known if the discussions over the issue started to head down a bad path.

2. Theodore Roosevelt- Teddy might have been a glory hog but he was a glory hog for the right reasons. Like his niece Eleanor, Teddy was a believer in human rights and also in the US government. He would bring experience and power to the panel. He showed that he would stand up for what was right for the country, even if it wasn't necessarily what was popular. And even if his decisions weren't universally popular, he would give reasonable explanations for his choices.

3. Robert F. Kennedy- I've always been a huge RFK fan. I wonder what his presidency would have been like if he hadn't been assassinated. Like TR, RFK wasn't afraid to tackle the hard issues. He was the power behind his brother's administration so he has experience. He fought for Civil Rights and against organized crime. And during his own presidential campaign, he was blunt and straightforward about the fact that tough decisions always need to be made and the US people may not always be 100% happy. I appreciate honesty like this from a politician.

4. Dwight D. Eisenhower- I know that Ike didn't necessarily favor minorities during his presidency but if you are looking for someone who has absolutely no mistakes or scandals on their resume' this ain't the list for you!!! We'd have to mark everybody off. So my reasoning for choosing Eisenhower is his dedication to this country. First and foremost, he was a soldier who planned amazingly successful missions and always was ready to accept criticism for his mistakes. He took this attitude into the White House and made it clear that he thought that the government should be above party politics. In a decision such as this one, everybody needs to follow Ike's Middle Way. He also cared about the common people of the United States. Ike would bring the qualities that made him a great soldier and a great President to the table and that's what this committee needs.

5. Harry Truman- Truman's decision to use atomic weaponry against Japan always overwhelms everything else that happened in his presidency but regardless of the fact that the atomic bombs were indeed crimes against nature, Truman himself manned up and made the decision that needed to be made. Is a decision about immigration as tough as one concerning bombing 2 cities? No!!! But it shows that Truman can make tough decisions regardless of what it does to his reputation. In addition, Truman stood up for Civil Rights and stood strong in the early days of the Cold War.

6. Richard Nixon- What?!? The guy that perpetrated Watergate and isn't a crook?!? Yep, him. If there's a breach in the space/time continuum, then we can go back and get pre-Watergate Nixon. I want the Nixon who made tough choices in dealing with the Vietnam War and stood up for the decisions he made. I want the Nixon who went to Moscow and got into the Kitchen Debate with Nikita Khrushchev. I want the Nixon who debated with JFK. Why? Because this Richard Nixon really wasn't a crook (yet); he was a well-educated, well-spoken, self-made man who could offer good advice to the committee.


Who would I not put on the list? This was actually pretty easy.

1. Jimmy Carter- Don't get me wrong, Jimmy Carter is one of the greatest humanitarians in American History but I think this might be a downfall for him in this particular instance.

2. Andrew Carnegie- I think that Carnegie might be a little too close to the issue. As an immigrant himself, he might not be able to be impartial. He could definitely give the committee his own story but his is very different than most immigrants. And too, as one of the biggest employers in American History, he might be a little biased on that front too.

3. Henry Ford- Same thing with Ford. Ford was a very intelligent man but I'm afraid he would approach this from an economic rather than a legal point of view.

4. William Jennings Bryan- Bryan was a great man in history but he was also very tightlaced in his beliefs. There's nothing wrong with this but Bryan had a history of walking away when he thought his own beliefs might be compromised. In this case, committee members can't just quit because they don't get their way.

5. Warren G. Harding- Can anybody say Teapot Dome Scandal? Not because of the scandal itself but because Harding was so caught up in the "good ole boy" system that he didn't figure out that his friends were screwing the country over. This committee needs people who are paying attention and can actually make good choices!


Now, all of that being said, if there is a breach in the space/time continuum then I ought to be able to pluck the perfect people out of the abyss right? Here's what I think would actually be the absolute perfect group of advisors...

1. Chuck Norris- enough said.

2. George Washington- I know he wasn't on the list because this was an American History II class and he's American History I but my man GW needs to be on every committee in existance.

3. Julius Caesar- What! He's not even American! Hell, there wasn't an America when Caesar lived but Caesar was the man! He made decisions that helped the common people (and of course boosted his popularity but still) and bucked the system when the rest of the government balked.

4. Albus Dumbledore- I know, he's not real but there is no decision that Dumbledore couldn't make. Like GW, Dumbledore needs to be on every committee.

5. Yoda- A little green alien? Yes, a little green alien who trained Jedi for a thousand years. If anybody has experience to make the right decisions in a rough situation, it's Yoda. Plus, I just like the way he talks.

(And yes, before you freak out and wonder if I've lost my mind... I have but I'm not really serious about the the last batch on the list. They would be cool though, wouldn't they?)

Monday Classes- It's all over!

Wow! Looking at the last date that I actually published a post, I just realized what a slacker I am! It's been two months! No wonder Blogger gave me the side eye when I signed in like "And just who are you???" My only excuse is that this has been an intense semester and as soon as finals are done, I'm going to get back into the posting groove.

Anywhoooooo... Monday Night Franklin and Mon/Wed Columbia classes, you guys are in the books. I just got done posting your grades to the Columbia State system and you should be able to view them on or after May 14.

For you Columbia folks, the average grade was a 76 before the curve or bonus. Don't let that give you a case of the vapors! It's actually pretty good considering the amount of material we covered and the fact that there were a lot of book questions. The curve was 6 points set by the great Rachael W. Congrats Rachael!

As far as the essays go for both classes, my biggest complaint is that a lot of you simply didn't follow through with your explanations. You would tell me that so-and-so should be on the pro list because they would be great at negotiations or because their personal insight would be valuable but you didn't tell me why!!! What was it specifically about them that made you say this. However, I can say that almost everybody in both classes got perfect scores on the "No" committee. You guys were very outspoken in the people that you would beat away from the committee door with a big stick! It was really fun to read these papers because I got a whole lot of insight into how you think.

Some of you asked if I would post my own lists on here so you could see what I would have written for this essay. Check back Sunday or Monday and you'll be able to pick my brain! I'll post my own essay after I get the grades done and submitted for my Friday class.

Finally, I think that some of you may be a little disappointed in your overall averages for the semester. A lot of you simply didn't do your movie reviews or only did one of them. That lack of a grade really hurt a lot of people. Many of you were THISCLOSE to the next grade up but missed it by a few points. In every one of these cases, you didn't do the extra credit. Also, participation hurt some of you. I think that a lot of you forgot that just showing up for class isn't enough. You had to EARN your participation points and believe me, I didn't give them to you if you didn't earn them. Keep both of those points in mind when you pull up your grades and got a C if you were expecting a B or a B and wanted an A.

Regardless, I really enjoyed both of your classes. I hope you learned something that you just never expected, something that made you go "Hmmm" and want to learn more. We only scratched the surface :)

Have a wonderful summer!